


Dean Winchester Doesn’t Like Taylor Swift (Except That He Does)

by teacass (Fushigi)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: #BringBackCharlie, Gen, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker, Team Free Will, this is me getting rid of my Dean feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-18
Updated: 2015-05-18
Packaged: 2018-03-31 04:08:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3963823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fushigi/pseuds/teacass
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a Dean lovefest because he is our darling and he deserves it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dean Winchester Doesn’t Like Taylor Swift (Except That He Does)

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote it more than two months ago and it's been sitting in my folder ever since. Then everything else happened: Cas and Charlie met for real, there was pizza and laughing and family feels, and then--Charlie was there no longer. And yesterday Misha and Jensen danced to Queen.  
> So here, have our happy family evening with dancing and Taylor Swift.

Castiel loves Dean.

He loves Dean because Dean is caring, loyal and has a big heart. Because he fights with all he has to save people and he always mourns for those he can’t save. Dean may be crude and obstinate, he may hold a grudge for a long time, especially when you do something that really hurts him; but when it really matters, he’s quick to forgive—in his mind, his family is the most important thing in the world, even when it is also the family that causes you the greatest suffering. Castiel has done so many wrong things in the past, has made so many bad decisions, but Dean still thinks of him as a part of his family. And Castiel loves Dean for that.

He has known Dean’s worth since he pulled him out of hell and put his soul back together. At the beginning of their acquaintanceship, Dean didn’t really show him any gratitude and they both had a bit of a hard time getting to know each other. But neither of them gave up, and now here they are.

Castiel looks around and smiles. They’re all in the bunker, sitting around the table in the library with Charlie, Jody and Garth, drinking beers and chatting. Dean is eating his third slice of the pie Charlie has brought with her and Castiel’s smile turns soft; it’s been a long time since he saw Dean so relaxed and happy. It doesn’t surprise him, however. Life hasn’t been easy for the Winchesters recently, and it still isn’t, not really, but right now, at this moment, surrounded by his family, Dean is at peace.

Presently, Dean is talking with his mouth full and Sam is making faces at him. Dean smacks him on the head with his free hand, the guests laugh and join their banter, and Castiel remembers another reason for loving Dean Winchester. Dean loves his family with every fibre in his body but his love for Sam is even more overwhelming. As an angel, Castiel wasn’t supposed to experience emotions, but even then he couldn’t help but feel a weird mix of pride and wonder at the thought of Dean’s kindness. Castiel has had time to get used to the sensation he feels when he’s around Dean, and turning human only intensified his feelings. Sometimes Castiel meets small children, looks at them, and feels like choking because he realises Dean was four when he’s started looking after his brother. _Four_. Dean was a little boy himself, but he was able to almost completely sacrifice his childhood in order to care for Sam.

Dean still looks at his brother with the intensity and care typical of a mother, as if he was the only one who could protect Sam from all the evil in the world.  Castiel stares at Dean and feels his heart swell with love.

Dean is the one who taught Castiel how to think for himself. He accepted him after everything he’d done, even when at first it seemed he never wanted to forgive him. He didn’t push him away when Castiel turned his back on them and started working with Crowley, nor when he came back without any memories, nor when he lost his sanity. He didn’t leave him in Purgatory, and even more than that—he has spent a _year_ looking for him so that he could take him back home. He made him leave the bunker only because he wanted to protect his brother, and Castiel understood it, and then he welcomed him back in his life again so that Castiel could feel needed again. He still does, even with his limited powers and his fading grace. He feels needed and _wanted_ because even though they’re not doing anything important right now, he’s still welcomed in the bunker to sit and eat and laugh with them.

Charlie is playing some music on her small portable computer and Garth and Jody are swaying in their chairs. The song is fast and quite catchy and suddenly Sam starts laughing while Dean’s face turns pink.

“Shut up, Sam,” Dean mutters and gulps his beer.

“No, Dean, don’t bullshit me! I _know_ you like Taylor Swift, you told me that yourself!” Sam crows happily and now even Dean’s ears are red.

“No, I didn’t!”

Charlie, Jody and Garth start howling with laughter and Castiel smiles at Dean more fondly.

“Stop that right now, you son of a bitch,” Dean accuses him.

Castiel blinks. “Stop what?” he asks, confused.

“You—you’re all crazy and I hate you and I’m gonna kill you in your sleep tonight, Sam,” Dean stutters.

“What did I do?” Sam gasps and laughs some more.

Dean sits back in his chair, with his arms crossed over his chest and a very stormy face, ignoring everyone and staring at some point on the ceiling, but after a while, Castiel notices Dean’s fingers playing a rhythm on his arm.

Sometimes Dean is still very insecure. He tries to fight it, Castiel knows that, but it seems that Dean still feels as if he is supposed to live up to someone’s non-existent expectations. There are probably millions of little things Dean still can’t admit even to himself but Castiel is aware of some of them and it doesn’t change the way he feels about Dean. Nothing will ever change it.

Castiel loves Dean because sometimes Dean doesn’t love himself enough.

Three songs and one beer later, Dean all but forgets about his grudge and starts talking again. None of them brings back the subject of him liking that one particular singer. Castiel can see the silent gratitude on his face and in his body, in the way he relaxes again. It’s as if they have all silently agreed on showing Dean that it’s okay to like things.

Then Garth holds out his hand to Charlie and takes her to the middle of the room where they laugh and start dancing to the music. Dean snorts into his beer and they all watch Charlie jumping around and Garth doing quick pirouettes around the library. Sam begins to applaud them, then stops, sends Dean a small smile and stands up to lead Jody to the improvised dance floor. Dean laughs out loud and hides his face in his hands for a moment, his shoulders shaking from laughter.

Castiel’s fingers are moving on their own accord as he watches the dancers, and he smiles. Then he catches Dean sneaking a glance at him.

Several seconds pass when they’re looking at each other, then Dean laughs quietly and looks away, and Castiel smiles lightly and also drops his gaze. He knows what Dean is thinking because he is thinking it as well.

But he also knows Dean. He knows that Dean won’t dance, not to this music, not tonight, not with him, and even not alone. He won’t dance because he doesn’t feel comfortable, even though maybe deep down he really wants to.

But he won’t, and Castiel won’t, either, so they just smile at each other and then keep on watching their friends.

 


End file.
